Ridiculous landlord / house share rules that went viral

By George Rushworth on November 27th, 2018 / Views
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This week a woman from London went viral with her list of 12 rules in search for her new flatmate.
  1. Be out of the flat on weekdays during working hours so I can work from home.
  2. Be quiet and considerate. Use door handles rather than slamming.
  3. Don’t use the phone or Skype a lot throughout the day.
  4. We’re not a sociable house but you should have good manners and speak to your housemates.
  5. Be someone who has friends and don’t spend to much time at home watching tv on your laptop.
  6. Follow the cleaning rota this is not a student dorm.
  7. Don’t move in if you go to the toilet a lot or take long showers.
  8. No cooking in the flat between 8.30 am and 11 pm. I don’t like people spending a lot of time cooking in general.
  9. Everyone is expected to clean up after themselves in the kitchen and the bathroom.
  10. I don’t want to see your friends constantly hanging around the flat.
  11. Boyfriends and girlfriends are ok as long as they’re not sleeping over more than 3-4 times a week.
  12. I don’t want to see people under the influence of drugs and alcohol. reasonable amounts are fine.
If you think some of those are unreasonable check out this landlords list
  1. No pork EVER IN THE HOUSE or fridge.
  2. No showers that last more than 15 minutes.
  3. Leaving dishes in the sink will result in a charge of an extra £15 on the rent.
  4. No additional heaters to be added otherwise a charge of £100 will be added to the rent.
  5. Visitors to be approved two weeks in advance.
  6. Never use somebody else’s shampoo.
  7. Personal belongings left in communal areas of the flat to be thrown away as junk.
  8. No food to be eaten in bedrooms.

We’ve saved the best till last read this hilarious landlord letter.

Dear residents. Due to the recent action of a specific tenant, we have been forced to update our community rules. Please find these new rules below.

  1. No trash bags placed outside your door.
  2. No loud music after 10 pm.
  3. No yodeling at any time.
  4. Do not feed the squirrels nachos.
  5. Do not change the sign to the fitness center to “fatness center”
  6. Do not pill out YU-GI-OH cards and threaten to send residents to “the shadow realm”
  7. Do not climb other peoples belongings while drunkenly yelling “I AM SPIDER-MAN”
  9. Do not place rent checks inside bear traps outside the rental office.
  10. Do not make rent checks out to “you greedy mother f***ers”
  12. Do not enter the laundry room in a luchador mask and attempt to wrestle other residents.
  13. No trick or treat unless you are a kid and its Halloween.
  14. Do not yell order up and throw hot dogs at people walking past your window.
  15. Do not attach basketball hoops above residents doors, knock, and when they answer dunk on them.

Moving forward failure to abide by these rules will result in eviction. Thank you. Management.

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